MORE ACTIVE ON TUMBLR. FIND ME THERE.
I want your love, I don't wanna be friends.
Okay, I'm currently addicted to Bad Romance.
So do you guys think I'm in a bad romance?
Another chapter closed?
"When people walk away from you, let them go. Your destiny is never tied to anyone who leaves you & it doesn't mean they are bad people. It just means that their part in your story is over."
I got this from Syarah's facebook... How true. Hais :(
1757290110
The sky greyed
And those moments were replayed.
In my mind I tried to picture
What I thought was going to be the future...
Raindrops fell
When I tried to tell
Of how I felt about you.
But sadly, I realise it wasn't gonna come true...
The downpour got heavier
And at the same time,
I felt the feeling's getting heavier.
I wanted to be the only one,
But I knew that you were only out to have some fun...
I felt so stupid,
But blame it on cupid.
It was stupid to fall in love with you,
But what could I do..?
Now you're slowly backing away,
In my heart I could only pray,
That you would be happy with your princess.
But I still love you,
I confess.
1757hrs
29thJanuary2010
Gaga Oooh Lala.
No. I'm not Gaga-crazy. I'm just gonna go slack with Reagan Sistar and Angela Soul again. :]
I wish I was special, so fucking special.
The picture above made me think alot and I'm feeling down like no one's fucking business. Hais. :(:(:(
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Yesteday is History, Today is Monday.
I had a heart-to-heart chat with Wiwie ytd. There was a very high weightage of truth in whatever she said. I cried. Coz I couldn't hold back the tears. Hais. :(
Slacked with Reagan and Angela after school. Slacked for quite awhile and we talked cock. Then Reagan played a stupid trick on me. Walaooooo.
Went to meet D aft that. Had a somewhat heart-to-heart talk. Some stuff are somewhat off my shoulders now and I feel better. And D gave me money to cab home. Awwwwww.
Idk why but I feel one kind of superbly shag. Walaoehhhhhhhh. =.=
Should I or Should I Not?
At this point of time, I just feel like giving up on everything. This is damn tiring, mentally, physically and emotionally. Hais. :(
Lepakxzxz 210110
Ianiie fetched me at school yesterday. Walked to Causeway. Ate at Banquet and halfway, Ek came. Continued eating then we went to Civic Garden to slack. Saw Nadttttttttt. Mak kau, 3 kali dier salam/pelok aku. Heheheheheh! Kekek pe girl! Slacked till 7 then I went home while Ianiie accompanied Ek to work.
The three of us are going to Grandlink for karaoke next Friday! (Y)
Wiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii.
Currently at the school library with Angela and Reagan. :] Played Wii! Ian accompanied me the whole day. :D
And some PCB MAKCIK COMMENT ON WHAT I WEAR. WANT SAY ME NEVERMIND. STILL SAY MY FATHER MOTHER. CHEEBYE. THIS ONE CONFIRM NEVER GET HER HUSBAND LANJIAO YTD THATS WHY TODAY KAN ME. KNNBCCB. I SEE HER AGAIN I SWEAR I SHOOT HER BACK CHEEBYE KIA. KNN. NOT HAPPY COME TALK TO ME LA, WHY MUST TELL MY FRIEND? SHE HUM DONT DARE TALK TO ME ISIT. NABEICHAOCHEEBYE MOTHER PROSTITUTE FATHER GIGOLO.
SLEEEEEPEEEEE.
Okay I'm super fucking sleepy right now, especially since I've just finished eating. And thanks to Angela Soul for the card. ♥
Communication ytd was fucking fun. I was a wreck of nerves during presentation coz it was super formal. But it was a whole lot of fun thanks to my dearies Dhilah and Atikah. ♥ Though my feet hurt from wearing the heels, and my blister broke this morning. Fucking hurts.
Seasons are changing, Waves are crashing.
Been thinking alot lately. Can't seem to get stuff out of my head. So many things fucking up my mind. So many questions left unanswered. I'm lost.
People always say "don't lick back what you spit". But I'm actually doing the opposite. I can imagine the disagreement that I will receive once news gets out. It wasn't easy for me. Its hard to love, but its even harder to hate. People always misuse the word 'hate'. I misused it too. For 7 long months, I tried to hate. I tried and tried. I deleted his number (but his number has always been embed in my mind), I deleted him off my FB, I deleted him off my MSN and the worse thing is... I deleted all our photos. Our memories. Our archives.
I remembered the first few days. I always had someone to sms all day long, always had someone to talk on the phone for hours on end. But when it was over, I felt empty. There were many instances that I wanted to text and call him. But I didn't wna be the one who always gave in. I've been giving in for 3 years. I didn't wna give in anymore. I waited for him to text me, he waited for me to text him. It became a waiting game. A game that lasted 7 months. Sometimes at night I wonder how was he getting on and stuff like that. I missed him alot and sometimes I would cry, thinking that there was no way we could salvage what we had. It hurts alot at that point of time. Sometimes when we passed by the places that we always hang out at, places that we always have our meals, this overwhelming feeling engulfs me to the point that I just feel like breaking down. I remember crying while listening to certain songs that we used to listen in class and singing along together. Beneath my tough exterior, the insides were actually crumbling down bit by bit.
I was actually looking through my emails recently when I actually chanced upon an email I sent him. It was a picture of us. And that was the only picture that was left. I smiled looking at the picture and reminsced on the past. And coincidentally that evening, he actually texted me. It totally caught me by surprise. And we made plans to meet on Sunday. I was actually kinda nervous coz its been a very long time.
So... We met yesterday. He came round my place and we walked to Northpoint. The first thing I did upon seeing him was to give him a hug. I swear I felt like crying at that point of time. We talked while walking and we went to slack at resevoir. There, I told him about almost everything. That there'll be no more chances if he screws this up. He didn't talk alot. He just nodded. =.= So much for anticipating his reaction ar? But I'm glad that things are slightly better. Not great, but better than than those 7 months.
I just want to salvage whatever we left hanging in the past. Coz I treasure this too much to let it go.
Weekends.
JB trip ytd was awesome. And the best part was, my hp connection was M1 all the way, it didnt change to MyDigi or Maxis. (Y)
Went to meet D today. Talked. I think I talked much more than he did. That doesn't mean everythings a-ok.
He has to prove it to me.
Been uploading photos since 3.30. FML.
After 7 months...
"I gotta be out my mind
To think it's gonna work this time
A part of me wants to leave
But the other side still believes..."
It came as a total shock to me this evening. It was totally unexpected. And i can't stop thinking about it...
After 7 long months, he finally realised how much I mean to him. How much I cared for him. 7months is loooooong. I have a feeling I'm gonna get alot of this disagreements from friends on this matter. Call me stupid, call me dumb. I don't care. I just hope that he will treasure this chance that I've given him, for I don't think there's gonna be another chance after this if he screws this up. So yea. I will try, no, we will try to salvage whatever we can from our 3 years archives and work things out. I can lie to everybody except for myself. I just want this to work out. D, fulfill your promise.
A Wednesday.
I took the photo above last Wednesday while I was walking towards the Sentosa express. Its been a week since I had pure fun. lol.
Wondering if I should drop by to Suntec? Its been a long time since I'd been there. Since the start of Sem 2, I've never been there once. I used to drop by there once a week. And I miss that place like HELL.
Supereffing Sleepy.
I am superfucking bored and am falling asleep. Currently in LT-W2 for DBA Module Selection briefing. The module chair is boring the shit out of me. Seriously. I'm now slumped in the chair and am half asleep while blogging, listening to This Love - Alicia Pan and chatting with Nazry Lil Bro online.
CONGRATS TO NAZRY LIL BRO FOR SCORING 12! LU BAEK AR BRO! THIS SMALL GUY NEVER GOT DISTINCTION FOR LITERATURE BEFORE AND HE GOT AND A1 FOR O'S! CONGRATS BRO! I'M PROUD OF YOUUUUUUUU. :D
I super miss Dear! Been 3 weeks since I last saw him. :( Take care of your hand k Dear. We'll meet soon right? I miss you trailerloads Dear ♥
Its A Wrap!
After 3 days, its a wrap. I made a few new friends and they're an awesome bunch of people. Eventhough my feet hurt and I was damn tired, it was such a supereffing fun experience. And I realised I was the only Year 1 student there. HAHAHA! :D
TGIF?
Okaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay. Thank God It's Friday. But I am still involved for the open house tmr. Another long day. :( But it's okay, I'll have Afiq to talk crap with. :)
Am currently on my lunch break. Me and Dhilah decided to go up to class and here we are! Dhilah is sleeping while I'm busy typing away on Angela soul's laptop. Thanks soul! :]
Dear hasn't texted me all day ytd and today.
